Playdate Gone Wrong

I would love to hear from you if you’ve had a worse playdate than this.

Jonathan’s birthday was last Saturday, and on Friday I let Ellie have a friend over thinking that she would be busy playing thus allowing me to clean and cook in preparation for our first social event (my mom, dad, brother, and aunt were coming for lunch and cake and stuff on Saturday).

It started innocently enough.  Ellie and Sarah (names have been changed to protect the child who will likely never be over here again) went into Ellie’s room to play.  Dress up, I thought.  But instead they found a piece of styrofoam from all of our unpacking and decided to crumble it up into rice sized pieces and rub it all over themselves…especially in their hair.  I don’t know why.  But it made me mad so I scolded accordingly plus administered consequences.  They had to clean up all the toys so I could vacuum.  

Then they went outside.  And did it again.

So I scolded some more.  I think my scolding must not be very effective, but judge for yourself. 

At this point I figured the unsupervised play just wasn’t going to work so I got the girls set up with playdough and toys at the kitchen table.  Sarah wanted to use the bathroom so, of course, I let her.  And she dug all of the wax out of my cute pomegranate scented candles that were on the window sill and smeared it around the tiles.

So I scolded?  And cleaned up.  And sent them back outside without any styrofoam.  

Then the worst part happened.  I was doing dishes when Jonathan started yelling, “MOM, Ellie’s friend is going to the bathroom in our yard!”

I briskly trotted to the backdoor and opened it to find “Sarah” doing a humungous poo on our back step.  I am not kidding!  A poo!  Ahhhhhhhh!

I will not frighten you with the cleaning it/her up details, suffice it to say she had poop all over her (no I don’t know how/why she just did) and I almost barfed several times and used a whole lot of Lysol wipes.  Now I think it is mean to clean a kid with Lysol, but I was in shock and cannot be held accountable.

I double wrapped everything she was wearing up into plastic bags and gave the bundle  to her father when he came to pick her up.  

The weirdest part is that he didn’t seem perturbed at all (boy, I was) and her mom didn’t call to ask what happened or anything…maybe they think that is normal?

So can you top that?  Huh?

And it doesn’t count if any of my children were involved so I don’t want to hear about Matt and Jonathan with the tomatoes, or Ellie and Kaitlin with the Tide.

Anything else goes.


6 Responses so far »

  1. 1

    katrina said,

    ok, but now i want to hear about those “other” stories. matt, jonathan and tomatoes does sound like a deadly combination.

    PS- i love playdates gone wrong, cause they remind me that my kids aren’t so bad.

  2. 2

    Aunt Colleen said,

    It’s that laid back California attitude….what, me worry? Although, I did believe that civilization had come to the West…but, maybe not 😉

  3. 3

    Sara Slatter said,

    Did this seriously happened or are you just seeing if we will bite and tell you…yes you should write a book?
    I thought that the tomatoe playdate would be the worst ever…but now “little Sarah” has toped it.
    I don’t have words to express what I am thinking? WOW.

  4. 4

    Marc said,

    It really happened . . . and I was very supportive when I came home. I took Shelley out that evening and gave her the “poor, poor Shelley” treatment. And because I could see she was a bit traumatized, I didn’t laugh even once when she told me all about it, which was very hard because that was one freaky playdate.

  5. 5

    heytar said,

    I totally remember the tomato playdate and have always kept it near and dear to my heart. But this isn’t anything I want to keep near and dear to my heart. Banish Sarah…

  6. 6

    Paige said,

    Okay, I just want everyone to know that I got the phone call on the day of this playdate. Fortunately I was not able to answer the phone because Shelley left the BEST voicemail I have ever received. I was able to download it and put it on my iPod and periodically it will come up in my shuffle and I DIE laughing. Sorry Shell. Too funny. And I thought we weren’t talking about the tomatoes anymore. . . . . . . .

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